Is Asking for Money instead of Gifts Taboo? Not If You Do It Right

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What if your wedding registry was set up to help you buy your first house? What would that look like? Typically it would entail asking for money in lieu of wedding gifts. Yikes! That can be tricky. You're not supposed to ask for money outright.

Now if you want to register for housewares or honeymoons, no problem, there are online registries for that. But what if you want to register for a bathroom remodel, a couple of new iPads, AND a honeymoon AND bamboo organizing containers? Now you have a couple of different registries going, and you're asking for cash again. Yuck.

Money can be a touchy subject, surrounded by dos and don'ts. Do save for a rainy day. Don't talk openly about your finances. Do negotiate your salary. Don't tell anyone you're doing so. Do set up a wedding registry to help set up your new home together. Don't ask for cash outright.

Now throw in the complexity of modern love. You've been dating for 5 years, and living together for three. You both have solid careers and have all of the towels, linens, and glassware you need. You don't need more stuff–well not much more. What you really need–really want– is a home of your own to put it in. You want cash for a down payment, but, oops, you're not supposed to ask for cash.

OK, times are changing for us 21st century brides, and with the help of cash registries, many of us ARE asking for money in lieu of gifts. But you know and I know that some people in your family and on your guest list find the prospect giving you a pile of cash instead of lovely lace linens off-putting.

That's why I love the Wedding Republic. It's a cash registry dressed up like a traditional wedding registry. You can register for a down payment on a new home, your ski honeymoon, that bathroom remodel, or that case of vintage wine you two have been eyeballing. You can even register for a few date nights at that super-fancy restaurant you adore but can't afford, and those traditional registry items you've always wanted. Bottom line: the Wedding Republic offers one of the most comprehensive and flexible online wedding registries I've seen.

Here's How it works:

1. Create your wish list. This can be anything. Browse through a gallery of gift ideas and select what you want, or create your own. The best part is each gift is totally customizable. You can toggle the price up or down, tweak the description, and add your own personal story. In fact, I highly recommend adding your own story. It gives wedding guests a glimpse into your lives and lets them know that the gifts they're contributing to are truly meaningful to you! For ideas, check out this sample wedding registry.

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2. Share: Once you've created your registry, you can easily share it with your guests through social media, email, your wedding website, or even word of mouth (which I highly recommend). While etiquette goes against it, you can even order inserts go go in your wedding invitations.

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3. Watch the Contribution come in: Once your guests receive notice, they can go online to your personal wedding registry and select items to buy or contribute to. There are two features the Wedding Republic offers that I just love.

  1. The puzzle piece feature allows guests to contribute to big-ticket items in increments. Thinking of their contribution as a “piece of the puzzle” makes it fun and engaging! But here's the very best part. Even if all of the puzzle pieces aren't purchased, you still get the cash contributed. Um, yeah!
  2. For those more traditional guests who want to give you something physical, the Wedding Republic allows guests to print a certificate to include in a card to you.

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3. Watch as your Guests contribute to your personal dream registry. Wedding Republic has a comprehensive and intuitive dashboard that allows you to see who has contributed. The Wedding Republic will also email you when someone contributes so you don't have to refresh your browser all day when you should be working ;-)

Tracking contributions will especially will come in handy when it comes time to writing thank you notes. Be sure to customize each thank you note saying how your guests contribution helped buy that reclaimed barnwood kitchen island, or the his and hers iPads you took on your ski honeymoon to Chamonix.

The dashboard also allows to to switch things up, adding deleting, and changing items as you like. Since this is really a cash registry, you can also modify your registry at any time.

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4. Grab your cash: Done and done! Once your registry closes, Wedding Republic will send you your funds. You can opt for direct deposit into your bank account, a check that is mailed to you, or a Paypal deposit. Oh, and if you want to withdraw your funds before your closing date. No problem! Like I said, this is the most flexible wedding registries I've seen, and I've been following weddings for years!

See the Wedding Republic in action, start your registry today.